Thursday, August 4th, 2011
Captain America
Captain America is remarkably unremarkable as a movie. Each edge is so smoothly crenulate that you can smell the cookie-cutter that molded it; and, yes, this cookie came from a tube. Whereas nearly every major superhero franchise of the last decade has been spearheaded by a director who was taking to the Hollywood bank credits [...]
1 Comment » - Posted in Uncategorized by elliott
Thursday, July 28th, 2011
Transformers: Dark of the Moon
The footage Michael Bay shot for Transformers: Dark of the Moon wasn’t edited; it was songified. A symphony played in an exotic time signature, perhaps? Well. Nah. It’s really just visual babbling: a sort of hand-in-glove match for the dialogue and its delivery. Bay’s got his brain in the blender with all the proceeds he’s [...]
2 Comments » - Posted in Uncategorized by elliott
Thursday, April 7th, 2011
Sucker Punch
The beer in my gut from before I hit Sucker Punch doesn’t preclude me from knowing what the film was about; I only wish it did. The trailer had me fooled that maybe Zack Snyder, directing his own material for the first time, had gone ballistic in a redeemable, wacko-Zacko way. I’ve successfully evaded his [...]
4 Comments » - Posted in Uncategorized by elliott
Sunday, May 2nd, 2010
A Nightmare on Elm Street
There’s no dishonor in trying to improve upon Wes Craven’s classic A Nightmare on Elm Street; cloning it is another matter. It’s a form of ablation—using Freddy Krueger’s claws as surgical tools. The innards from the 1984 original have been removed, and placed, intact, in the gloomy frames that are meant to signify the present. [...]
2 Comments » - Posted in Uncategorized by elliott
Monday, July 6th, 2009
The Critic’s Criticism of His Critics
Of late, I’ve had the pleasure of reading some very negative comments made about my reviews. Because blogs are a newfangled, “democratic” medium, I respect my reader’s right to express him or herself that way, but I also reserve my right to respond—as lengthily (or douche-ily) as I please…
Comment 1:
Because God forbid we enjoy [...]