An Open Apology for a Bad Joke
One week and a day ago, I decided to write an April Fools’ Day, fake news-style post titled “Asian Community Center to be Built Adjacent to Library.” Earlier today, I removed the post because of a large amount of negative feedback.
The day or two before I wrote the post, there was a forum hosted to dicuss the plans for an Asian Community Center, which the S.A. had approved in November. The article’s central joke was that the center would be built next to the library so students could study more easily; this played up the “model minority” stereotype that Asians tend to work harder academically as a whole. While I’m not saying that the stereotype is completely unfounded, I think that it is the reason for the unrealistic academic pressure that Asian and Asian-American students face and likely the reason that they commit a disproportionate amount of Cornell’s suicides.
The rest of the post included myriad stereotypes about Asians: bubble tea, mispronounciation of Rs and Ls, you name it… In being over-the-top with layering on the stereotypes, I thought I could pull off an Onion-style article but it seems, as one commenter noted, that I went in the direction of Carlos Mencia.
In looking at articles on the Onion about Asian-Americans, I found that their angle focused on Asians who decided consciously to defy the stereotypes of being hard-working academic overachievers. This is probably the more tasteful way of addressing the situation, and ultimately the funnier one.
Some commenters seemed to think that I was some mega-racist or the epitome of what the Asian-American community needs to be afraid of. Neither is true: in the end, this was all just a bad, crass joke. So here I am, tail between my legs and offering the offended parties my sincerest apologies.
Sincerely,
D. Evan Mulvihill
EDIT: Comments were closed because I felt they exhausted the spectrum of responses. If you have something new to add, please email watch@kitschmag.com. (A further statement on this situation will be made in the coming days.)
EDIT#2: Comments are again open–but I will not hesitate to delete comments that are mean, hateful, or less than three words. (I’ll leave the existing hate comments for posterity.) After meeting with representatives of the Asian and Asian American Community Center (A3C), I am in the process of writing a longer and more comprehensive meta-apology-cum-personal-narrative that should hopefully be published in the Daily Sun before next Friday. As part of this process, I will be reposting the original offending April Fools’ Day blog in its original form. The only update will be a link to this apology and the acknowledgment of the Sun column-to-come.
April 8th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
sadly, this “apology” is unsigned, and the original post taken down, so i have no idea whose mea culpa (NOT!) this actually was. but whoever you are:
you can’t fight fire with fire. you can’t fight stereotypes by using stereotypes. you can’t fight hate by hating. seriously, why do i need to tell you this?
but i already have an inkling of why you got ahold of the wrong end of the stick. you seem to think that asian american suicide rates are caused by unrealistic academic pressure. let me just ask: do YOU get suicidal when you don’t measure up to your school’s expectations? no? then why would you think asians would? because we look so different with our slanty eyes that you can’t put any weird kind of hari-kiri behavior past us?
if you’re really that interested in asian american issues, instead of writing dumb shit out of your own ignorance, why don’t you do some reading and study instead? then you’d realize that the model minority myth comes from racist american immigration policies that only legally allow middle and upper middle class people to emigrate from third world countries. working class and poor latin americans can walk or ride across a desert border, which is why we have so many undocumented latinos in the US, but asians have to take expensive planes or boats across the world’s largest ocean. thus, the majority of asian immigrants are middle class on up, and the majority of asian americans are immigrants. the model minority students are their children. you do the math.
also, asian american economic “success” is overstated. asian american economic success is based on average household income numbers that don’t take into account self-employment or the number of working adults in a household. so the fact that asian american incomes are supposedly higher even than whites’ is false. whites generally have only one or two incomes per household where asian americans will have three or more working adults living together. also, asian americans are self-employed at a MUCH higher rate than whites, which means they are fully responsible for their own healthcare, which of course cuts way down on their actual take-home. so asian american incomes, adjusted to reflect the number of incomes per household and the amount of self-paid healthcare they’re responsible for, will still be far below the white norm.
and, as comfortable as it would be for you to believe that white american institutions are driving asian americans to suicide because we can’t handle the pressure of high expectations, that’s not actually at all the case. the east asian educational systems that korean american, chinese american, and japanese american immigrant parents are coming from is MUCH higher pressure/higher expectation than the floppy, sad, post-bush american school system. so exactly the opposite would be true: asian students would be finding an advantageous differential in the amount of academic pressure they get in the US. THIS is in fact why asian american students–especially the children of immigrants– do so well in american schools.
the factors that ACTUALLY lead to asian american depression are: institutionalized bullying and poor or no anti-bullying strategies by institutions, the constant pressure of being treated as an outsider by individuals and institutions in the country you grew up in, a lack of opportunities that match your educational level and familial expectations, failure to see yourself reflected or celebrated in our country’s image of success or normativity, constantly being viewed and discussed publicly as a problem, institutionalized mockery (like your article)–especially when that is the only media image in which you find yourself, lack of public social support for yourself, your family, and your other relationships, etc.
so dude, the next time you want to “help”–by exposing stereotypes or whatever–maybe you should GO TALK TO SOME ASIAN AMERICAN STUDENTS FIRST. maybe they don’t want or need your help. maybe they’d be glad of an ally but SHOULD BE THE ONES TO DETERMINE WHAT KIND OF HELP YOU SHOULD GIVE. and maybe, when you run some ideas past them, they can tell you where you’ve misconceived things, and KEEP YOU FROM WRITING DUMBASS SHIT LIKE YOUR POST APPARENTLY WAS.
April 8th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
Even though you apologized, I will not accept it and I am sure that is fine by you. This is the reason why,
“I wrote the satirical fake news article intending to exhaust the full spectrum of stereotypes about Asians. It was also an April Fools’ Day joke. It was intended to be so, so over-the-top that it might come across as not tasteless. In the end, I think if I had used only the positive stereotypes of Asians instead of the others (poor pronounciation, higher suicide rates, etc) then it might not have been such a flop.
I personally am close friends with many Asians, and don’t have any prejudgments about them. I know that as a whole Asians tend to be more studious which is what the article was supposed to harp on: the funniness that an Asian community center would be built right next to the library.
I’m glad that you would like to hear my side, because I think the discussions about racists and racism usually amounts to the “oppressed” group sitting together and whining about how oppressed they are instead of actually seeing what other people perceive their group.”
I was shown this apology by one of my colleagues
In paragraph 2, you said that you are close friends with Asians… how the fuck does that give you the right to name a Asian American female “Mi-So Honee”? How the fuck does that give you the right to mock the way we talk? You assume that because you are friends with a few Asians that it’s OK to make fun of who they are. I don’t give a fuck if you have close Asian friends. If you had an African American friend, would you make fun of them? If you had a Hispanic friend, would you have done the same? This is why I’m sick of people like you, you think you can get away with some bullshit like what you said in your April Fools Day article.
In the last paragraph, you said that you “think the discussions about racists and racism usually amounts to the ‘oppressed’ group sitting together and whining about how oppressed they are instead of actually seeing what other people perceive their group.” Well obviously I know now how people like you perceive Asians.
When I read the post, I did think you were a racist but now I know, you’re just ignorant.
April 8th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
I may be reading a further edited version of your apology, since it lacks comments about your asian friends, or about minorities complaing about being oppressed. Comments like those are typically a justification for ignorant behavior, rather than a sincere expression of regret
That being said, I do have to express my appreciation for the fact that you are, at all and in any form, apologizing in an expedient manner. Too often, a group will be ignored in their protests, or apologized to in an insulting and cavalier manner too far after the fact. So, while it may not have been elegent, I tip my hat to the attempt.
April 8th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
“you seem to think that asian american suicide rates are caused by unrealistic academic pressure.”
I meant the unrealistic academic pressure was coming from sources such as family and their immediate society, not by the colleges or universities themselves.
Clearly, this is a very emotional subject for a lot of Asian-Americans, and I didn’t realize that. I’m sorry that I played around with stereotypes, and made fun of an ethnic group. Apparently this isn’t enough for you guys–what more do you want? You are reading a lot more into this than is necessary. Please let it go.
I signed the note. Happy?
April 8th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
Please hear me.
Please listen to these words.
Because all the heated remarks here, all the justifiably enraged and lengthy replies left here, and, most of all, your own pathetic “apology” (read: gutless damage control), might blind you to one simple undeniable fact.
You
are
racist.
April 8th, 2008 at 6:46 pm
“…what more do you want?… Please let it go.”
Hehe, I’m waiting for the accusation of reverse racism next, along with a story of white immigrant working-class hardship. Who knew people of color might get emotional about racist stereotyping? What’s wrong with those people?
April 8th, 2008 at 7:10 pm
It is no wonder that people find it acceptable to make fun of asians in every sphere of American life. It is unfortnate, that your white privilege life will never allow to experience the same kind of hatred that your articles spewed. It provides ammunitions for racists, ignorants to make fun of Asians with impunity. It is no wonder that attacks on Asians are on the rise. Nothing speak louder about white privilege than your so called April’s fools.
April 8th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
You’re a closet-racist coming out, nonetheless.
April 8th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
your apology is NOT accepted. the original “joke” should never have been posted in the first place. it’s people like you that only further the stereotypes and make it that much harder for asians. the only reason you’re apologizing now is to save face from the backlash you have received. you make me sick and i wish you a miserable existence.
April 8th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
Oh boy, where to start…
Mr. Mulvihill said: “Clearly, this is a very emotional subject for a lot of Asian-Americans, and I didn’t realize that.”
Haha. Apparently you don’t realize a lot of things there, smart guy.
“I’m sorry that I played around with stereotypes, and made fun of an ethnic group. Apparently this isn’t enough for you guys–what more do you want?”
What are you, in third-grade? Because that’s about the last time when simply apologizing for an egregious error in judgement was enough to excuse you. Nice try, though.
And what do we want? Well, I don’t know what “we” want. But I know what _I_ want. I want you to go learn what it’s like to be Asian American. I want you to go live with an Asian family for a while. Study the culture, learn the language… you get the idea. It’s not enough that you admit what you did was offensive. I want you to find out firsthand _why_ the things you said are offensive. Educate yourself. Then you know what I want you to do? Go and educate others. Blog about your experiences and skip all the racist terms and stereotypes. Try to promote understanding and friendship between Asian Americans and other cultures. Then maybe you won’t be thought of as such a horse’s ass.
“You are reading a lot more into this than is necessary. Please let it go.”
Unfortunately for you, you aren’t the one who gets to decide what is “necessary” here… Nor is it your place to tell people to “let it go.” You put the words out there, on the Internet, for everyone to read. You’re getting everything that’s coming to you, champ.
“I signed the note. Happy?”
Y’know, having an attitude about all this really isn’t gonna help. If you’re really sorry, then you just gotta suck it up and deal.
And from the original apology post: “Some commenters seemed to think that I was some mega-racist or the epitome of what the Asian-American community needs to be afraid of. Neither is true: in the end, this was all just a bad, crass joke.”
Actually, I think this is exactly what the Asian American community (and most other minority communities, for that matter) have to be afraid of. The spread of ignorance. It’d be one thing if these thoughts never left your head. But you have to realize that the fact that you published that post actually justified that same behavior in other people. So, you have to realize that not only did your horrendously racist post offend a whole lot of Asian (and non-Asian) Americans, but you also helped spread ignorance and racism.
This isn’t just about you. This is about all the people you’ve now inspired and encouraged.
Do you get it now?
April 8th, 2008 at 9:20 pm
Wow. I can’t believe your gall, Evan. For someone who is supposedly standing there “tail between his legs”, you sure do cop one hell of an attitude. First, there’s your ridiculous non-apology where you actually say that “discussions about racists and racism usually amounts to the “oppressed” group sitting together and whining about how oppressed they are”. Oh, and of course, the good old stand-by: “I’m friends with lots of Asians so I can’t be racist.” Finally, you demand to know what more people want from you since you’ve obviously just being misinterpreted by those whiny minorities.
Other folks have said it already, but it bears worth repeating: your pathetic apology isn’t worth a damn and I personally don’t accept it. You are a racist, pure and simple.
April 8th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
As a third-generation member of a Chinese-American restaurant family, and the first to graduate from college, I want to point out that not all Asians are middle-class, recent immigrants. The history of Chinese immigration to the United States comprises many waves, the first significant one of which came during the Gold Rush in the late 1800s. The Trans-Continental Railroad was built by majority Chinese male labor, after which ungrateful, paranoid white America decided that the idea of Asian masculinity and hard work presented such a threat to their hegemony that they took steps such as the Chinese Exclusion Act, the only American immigration law to specifically exclude a group of people from immigrating to the United States, and a vast media conspiracy of stereotypes, known as “Yellow Peril,” to suppress Asian pride and self-esteem, making us perpetual foreigners even though we’ve contributed more than our share to the success of America. Because of white colonialist mentality, the Asian man is considered to be an asexual nerd, and the Asian woman an exotic sex toy, resulting in an ever growing interracial dating disparity, in which more than 75% of interracial relationships involving Asians are White male/Asian female, leaving an increasing percentage of Asian men, raised in a culture that teaches them to work hard, respect women and elders, and put their family first, bachelors, and a social phenomenon of Asian women and their part-Asian children with no appreciation or respect for their heritage.
Asians are not a “model minority” group that faces no real problems. In fact, the Chinese restaurant business is a 21st century version of indentured servitude that exploits illegal immigrants and ruins the lives of owners and employees alike, who have to provide extraordinarily large selections of premium food items at unfairly low cost, and have to pick up the slack by working 7 days a week, around 100 hours a week, of excruciatingly difficult and humiliating work.
Unfortunately, white America takes Asians for granted, and this is evident in the fact that it is “okay” to make fun of Asians in general, exclude us from power and prestige, put down our men, and fetishize our women. But it’s okay. Our time is coming. The 21st century will see the collapse of white America and the rise of Asia and the Asian disaspora in the world. It is a fact of immigration trends and upward social mobility, and your feeble efforts to perpetuate stereotypes in the face of the reality of Asian Power is laughable and sad.
April 8th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
This is America after all so I guess anything said against Asians is OK. But next April Fools day, try writing one about Jewish students or African American students and see the results. Of course, we are just bitching about nothing to you Angelo Saxons. But try living as an Asian male in an all white neighborhood (I am not talking about California, New York, or Hawaii) and see what you have to deal with everyday, especially if you don’t fit into the coward image. Hard working cops and other school officials will go out of their way to show you a good time that no money can buy. After you graduate and start working legitimately, see how your co-workers treat you just because “that’s how you SUPPOSE to be.” After you buy a house and own property, see how “all American kids” can vandalize your property and get away with it just by saying “Oh my god, I am so, so sorry.” Know how hard Asians are working and paying taxes to support the American community and still get blame for the failure of this country’s economy. We came here because our countries was sucked dry by Angelo Saxon parasites, not because we want to (Just like how you Europeans came here because you couldn’t stay in your own country). Of course no matter how we assimilate, we will never be looked upon as real Americans thanks to stereotypes like the masterpiece you wrote. All the fruits of our labor is credited to the “real Americans” and all the problems are caused by the “slants and fucking gooks/chinks” Check you facts homeboy, we have to score higher to get into the more prestigious schools, while all you other leeches can just make excess excuses to make us your scapegoats for your own personal failure in life. Its people like you that make this country “great and all American” and no, I can’t go back to where I came from because I was born here and I only speak English and they will deport me right back just like how you white folks want to deport the Mexicans. I may be an Asian, but I am definitely more “American” than you. I make more money and pay more taxes because I earned it through hard work and I will not become a burden to this country’s economy because of poor spending habits and bad financial management like the people who considers me “UnAmerican” I know how much we contributed to this country and if you hate Asians this much, than join the U.S. army or the Blackwater mercs and go to China and kill some real Chinks instead of spreading hate to people who are born and raised here. Don’t issue some fake ass, bitch ass apology and think that all Asians are still the cocksuckers that you guys use to fuck. We treat this country like our own so go write this shit to some other people and see if they’ll trip or if they just take it in the ass like the faggot ass that you parasites are. Oh, and your suicide comment is not really realistic. All those fucking drug using, homeless catz that be walking down the streets are not Asian but something else. Please, we are not our parents’ generation. You may think that we all “love u long time,” but actually it is you guys who will need us “long time” once China, Russia, and India takes influence 10-20yrs from now. By the way the so called prestigious universities are progressing, we won’t get very far compare to those future players in the international market. So wait and see who truly gets the last laugh. If any of you little tricks don’t like what I said, too bad. Just wait and see, the future is not far ahead if you are under 30 like me. Oh yeah, you and those neo nazis and KKK rankers are no different. You only do shit to people who won’t retaliate. Like I said before, try this on the brothers of essays and see what happens. Last but not least, UCLA rocks faggot ass Cornell any day so fuck you soft ass, pansy ass bitches.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
[Clearly, this is a very emotional subject for a lot of Asian-Americans, and I didn’t realize that. I’m sorry that I played around with stereotypes, and made fun of an ethnic group. Apparently this isn’t enough for you guys–what more do you want? You are reading a lot more into this than is necessary. Please let it go.
I signed the note. Happy?]
This is not about emotion. This is about racism, and your blow-off, no-big-deal response reeks of white privilege. What more do we want? We want people like you to reduce their ignorance and reach a deeper level of understanding of the root causes of racism. There’s nothing wrong with being ignorant, as long as you don’t plan to stay that way–due to the white supremacist education system I was brought up in, I knew next to nothing about the implications of race and racism in America and the world, and where I fit in as an Asian-American. The first privilege of white privilege is that white people have the freedom to ignore race if they so choose, and imagine that race and racism are no big deal, as you clearly do. It would behoove you, if you truly want to make an apology, to begin there. I’ll help you:
http://www.amptoons.com/blog/archives/2007/07/30/cartoon-white-lies/
http://seamonkey.ed.asu.edu/~mcisaac/emc598ge/Unpacking.html
April 8th, 2008 at 10:24 pm
You are a blight on society and a discrace to your institution. You racist idiot.
April 8th, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Dear Mulvihill,
You were probably surprised by the response you got from the article you wrote. You shouldn’t be. Every few months, some idiot college columnist tries to increase his or her street cred with a racist attack on Asians masked as comedy. This is because bigots like you don’t have the balls to say the same things about Blacks or Jews.
Taken aback by the backlash, you feebly protest that you can’t possibly be a racist, since you have photos taken with Asian people near you, and you would totally have sex with Asian women. Would probably even fly to Thailand to pay for it. We’ve heard it all before.
This is nothing new. You’re not the first, you won’t be the last. But you will be remembered.
You are right that not all stereotypes are unfounded. There are a lot of overachieving Asian Americans out there. Some will probably be reading your resume or interviewing you at some point. And while they might have trouble pronouncing your name with all of its Ls, I’m sure they will be able to recognize it just fine and will give it the consideration it deserves. That’s the beauty of the Internet.
April 9th, 2008 at 1:59 am
How pathetic
I kinda liked this site for a while but Ive gone off it completly now. Racists never learn do they…
April 9th, 2008 at 6:31 am
You are a moron and your parents rasied a fucken clown. If i ever see you stupid face i’ll smack it.
April 9th, 2008 at 7:13 am
Hey there D. Evan Mulvihill. Right on my white brother! Remind those Asians of what us white people find so funny about them. Those silly asians with their cat eating, slanty eyes, mispronunciation of engrish. Man there’s so much to make fun of them about. And they’re so easy to make fun of because no one will kick up a fuss. Not like those blacks or latinos because they’ll take what we say about them as being racist. But we white people know that making fun of Asian people is not being racist. It’s being funny. Satire… like the Onion! My favorite too! I love you D. Evan Mulvihill. Keep on being racist! Just only to Asians, because its funnier and, as you said, they should just “let it go.”
April 9th, 2008 at 7:44 am
Uhm, Evan?
I don’t know (virtually) anything about you except for the fact that you’re not asian, and you chose to write this article. Coming from that place, please take my comments as you will.
Being a white person, I have learned that we have *no right* to say what is or is not offensive, or by how much. also, if (or more likely when) we make a mistake, it is our responsibility to take whatever comments are made as graciously as possible, and not respond on the defensive. Just imagine that you were offended and hurt by something – how easy is it for you to respond directly to that person in a kind and educational manner? and how likely are you to do it again if they respond to you with “i didn’t mean it. it was the best of intentions. what more do you want?”
trying to educate myself as a white person has certainly not been easy – it has been humbling and difficult, and at times, I have certainly not wanted to give up. but I also know that there is no way for me to know anything about being a person of color and what that means. I might feel like i’m familiar because of my friends, my family, my family’s friends, my co-workers, or anyone else I associate with, but it doesn’t mean that the experience is *mine.*
April 9th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Stupid racist cunt
April 9th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Nice lipservice, just because you have asian friends doesn’t mean you don’t carry racist ideals, you dipstick ivy leaguers. No wonder Ivy League education is a joke.
April 9th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
racist biggot
April 16th, 2008 at 4:18 am
As an immigrant, a student and a black woman, I am not the slightest bit surprised that a white male would write *once again* another racist rant against Asians and their culture. I think of anything, your posts speaks more to the attitudes of entitlement with White America. For some strange reason, white folks simply cannot get over the fact that maybe Affirmative Action helps them out because THEY cannot achieve. Keep lying to yourself and believing that minorities are too stupid to be in college so they have to work harder than whites to get in and stay in. All that rhetoric does is keep you on the bottom of the totem pole considering that only 40% of white males have a college degree.
May 4th, 2008 at 2:33 am
You won’t hesitate to delete mean comments, right?
How about this? YOU DESERVE ALL OF IT AND MORE.
Did you ever learn about honor? Well, how about RESPONSIBILITY?
How about DISCIPLINE?
If you’re really sorry, offer the “parties” something more than a “sorry”.
Ask us what you can do to make this better.
For me? I’d like to see you make fun of yourself *enthusiastically*… It has to be at least 1000 words, complete with pictures and videos. You also have to discuss you being a caucasian as a possible source of your ignorance and blasphemy.
May 4th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
Wow. Lotsa hatred on this post. I have to agree with many on the point that your apology frankly sucked. I hope with the flood of comments in response to your apology/comment, you’re sort of beginning to see where everyone is coming from.
General question, though: is this fixation on White America, white privilege, and “you white folks” completely necessary or can it even be construed as a positive “contribution” to this ongoing discussion on race? There is no more evident example of the pot calling the kettle black.
I understand that many of these comments are emotionally-triggered, and I can bet that majority of these weren’t saved in drafts, reread, and then sent; however, what exactly are you accomplishing by throwing statistics of white males around and lamenting about the prevalent white privilege? It’s existent, but what exactly are you proposing will alleviate the ongoing stereotypes and racial injustices?
If you want to criticize the way he poorly apologized for his article, then fine. Likewise, all of your comments are subject to the same criticism for their utter inability to be contributory to the greater objective of “understanding each other.” His article may reflect that there is an awful lot about Asian cultures that he doesn’t understand or even appreciate, but to collect whites into this mass of White America shows the same lack of empathy that drives the perpetuation of racism in America.
You lament about racism, but you only contribute to it.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:25 am
As an outsider who is considerably older than many of the posters…can I say how impressed and proud I am of all the young people who write so beautifully and powerfully about the impact of these stereotypes?!? When I was starting college–almost 20 years ago–I am very sure I would not have had the confidence to speak up the way you are–and so effectively as well, with the anger the occasion deserves, but with such well-informed conviction that it makes it impossible to ignore you. It really inspires me to see how knowledgeable and confident you are. Gambatte!
June 16th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
You’re article wasn’t funny, at all, I’m sorry to say this. The racist thing didn’t help.
May 10th, 2009 at 8:12 pm
Aww, it’s just a joke?
Your mother sucked my dick last night for your education. How’s THAT for a joke, you piece of fly shit?
March 2nd, 2010 at 6:27 pm
Yet ANOTHER anti-asian racist tirade masquerading as humor?
Why do we get these every semester?
Look, the d-bag may have thought he wrote such a fantastic satire but the fact of the matter is, what he wrote was simply racist drivel. Satire DONE RIGHT provokes thought, not anger in the reader. It should be illegal for just any moron to attempt to write a satire because MOST people don’t do it right. And when you attempt to write a satire about an ethnic group that you not only don’t belong to, but is also discriminated against, you deserve all the backlash that you get. Someone post this douchebag’s picture so I’ll know to spit on his face if I ever encounter him.