CornellWatch

Although it’s been over a year since I flew the college coop, decent Cornell gossip still seems to come my way sometimes. Recently I received word from a trusted source that two gay students were caught earlier today with their pants down in a rather comprising location: a faculty member’s office. The source tells me that they weren’t just exchanging a little HJ action (NBD!) or a Beej (hey, that’s pushing it), they were “full on fucking,” like, as in a porno or something. The kicker? They had to write an apology note as penance. Of course, I can’t resist imagining the contents of this note. Our version is after the jump, leave your own in the comments. Read the rest of this entry »

An artist's rendering of the general flavor of this article.

If you have ever had your moments of doubt about the so-called liberal media, look no further than yesterday’s above-the-fold cover story in the esteemed Cornell Daily Sun. The article describes the pain, dismay, and utter, utter misfortune that 25 prospective students endured at the hands of the evil (Evil?) Office of Financial Aid. What happened was this: FinAid accidentally sent out a high-five e-mail to those 25 students, who had already been mercilessly rejected. According to the article, “Students who received the article said they were confused, disappointed, and outraged.”

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Breaking: Guy with funny last name (above) will drone on for a number of minutes in front of a bunch of hungover college kids on Sat, May 23. He apparently doesn’t appreciate the grammatical intricacies of the dash — and neither do we! — so we’ll save the commentary for more qualified commentators and just repost the notification email:

Dear Seniors,

On behalf of the 2009 Convocation Committee, I am pleased to announce that Mr. David Plouffe, Chief Campaign Manager of Obama for America, President Barack Obama’s historic presidential campaign, will headline the Class of 2009’s Convocation Ceremony on Saturday, May 23, 2009.

Our committee sought an individual who has had a profound impact on the society that our class has been prepared to enter. Mr. Plouffe was the mastermind behind one of the most significant and groundbreaking elections in our nation’s history.  His insights and leadership helped transform a little known state senator from Illinois to the leader of the free world.

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Since Peter Fritch and I have already covered the ongoing campus debate about the recent flare-up in the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict here and here, we’re going to present the following pictures of the new, “pro-Israel” Arts Quad display without comment. A note: I’m not sure if I got all of the signs, but my fingers were about to freeze off and lose grip of my precious, precious camphone, so take it or leave it.

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Has anyone seen any of the panelists from the Gaza in Crisis Discussion Panel hosted by the Cornell International Affairs Review (with various other groups, ranging from MECA to Tommy Bruce’s office to the International Soccer Club) on Wednesday? From what I heard, the moderator prefaced the discussion by stating that he knows very little about Gaza, proceeding to cite a summary from Wikipedia in a room full of well-informed, emotionally charged college students. I wouldn’t be surprised if the panelists were shanked walking home that night.

For those actually wanting to engage in a dialogue, meaning the Islamic Alliance for Justice (IAJ), Hillel, Cornell Israel Public Affairs Committee (CIPAC), and the Daily Sun herself, a real panel discussion was held the next day in the same exact room (Lewis Auditorium), one in which the panelists (gasp!) seemed to know what they were talking about.

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