CornellWatch

Get it? Clevah.

Apples and Peels Un-Cause Cancer: New CU research says it! Believe!

“Sick prank”: So saith an Ithaca Fire Lt. of a mannequin found facedown in the gorge. I say it’s kind of funny, in a horrible way?

Doctors Are Paid More than Presidents: “At Cornell, Dr. Zev Rosenwaks of the Center for Reproductive Medicine and Infertility received $3,149,376…” D-Skortz only made around $700k.

Cornell Dots Will Cure Cancer!: What exactly are these “C dots”? “The cluster of dye molecules in a single dot fluoresces under near-infrared light much more brightly than single dye molecules, and the fluorescence will identify malignant cells, showing a surgeon exactly what needs to be cut out and helping ensure that all malignant cells are found.”

Nominate Ur Fwendz: Do u no some1 who iz rly gud at there like orgunizashun? Nom’ them 4 a Student Organization Award or Recognition (SOAR! Far above!). Due Thurz.

“Budget Bondage”: Has the recession been cutting into your plan to one-up Goatse by utilizing expensive state-of-the-art anus-expanding instruments? Then this event is perfect for YOU.

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Hefty, possibly gay, probably Scottish.

Cookbooks Make You Fat: Says Brian Wansink, the professor who loves sending his press releases to the media. Also, foods like these make you fat.

Collegetown Council Proposal: Solid summary and analysis by the Ithacator.

Review blog discovers gay people kiss: And that they believe in this totally crazy idea that heterosexuality is normative. Crazy gays!

A Purposeful Ellipsis’d NYTimes Quotes: “Two decades ago a 23-year-old Cornell University graduate student brought the Internet to its knees…”

Cotton Candy Cure: It just might help labs grow tissue yay!

A New Low for Sun Blogs: “Allow me to preface this entry by letting the reader know that I am abroad in Scotland for the semester. Without that information, you may find yourself terribly lost. I have stepped outside of the culture I know all too well and revel in all too often, and have embarked on a journey to the birthplace of the bagpipe.”

One of Coulter's biggest fan's rendition of the superstar herself.

Least appreciated Cornell alum in hot water over technicality: Ann Coulter voted in Connecticut while living in New York. In other news, no one really cares. Except maybe the person who photoshopped the image at left. [Cornell Insider] P.S. We apologize to any Nazis offended by the image.

Milstein hits new roadblock: The plans for the construction of Architecture building Milstein Hall have already taken 10 years to push through. But no! It must not go forward, claim annoying profs like Vincent Mulcahy, who doth protest the lack of accessibility to differently-abled persons: “A handicap [sic] person who might want to study architecture here, it’s impossible.” [News 10 Now]

The nerve!: Either CornellWatch is too young, too unread, and/or too unfabulous, or we got SNUBBED by USNews.com in their “Best Alternative Media Outlet 2008″ contest. Whatever. IvyGate is in dead last, so we’re going to try to be schadenfreude-y about that. [USNews.com]

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