CornellWatch

B(l)I(n)G(ee) RED RELIEF 2K9. A bit tasteless, I know.

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Breaking: Guy with funny last name (above) will drone on for a number of minutes in front of a bunch of hungover college kids on Sat, May 23. He apparently doesn’t appreciate the grammatical intricacies of the dash — and neither do we! — so we’ll save the commentary for more qualified commentators and just repost the notification email:

Dear Seniors,

On behalf of the 2009 Convocation Committee, I am pleased to announce that Mr. David Plouffe, Chief Campaign Manager of Obama for America, President Barack Obama’s historic presidential campaign, will headline the Class of 2009’s Convocation Ceremony on Saturday, May 23, 2009.

Our committee sought an individual who has had a profound impact on the society that our class has been prepared to enter. Mr. Plouffe was the mastermind behind one of the most significant and groundbreaking elections in our nation’s history.  His insights and leadership helped transform a little known state senator from Illinois to the leader of the free world.

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Perhaps that is Shawnna’s leg? We’ll never know.

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Get it? Clevah.

Apples and Peels Un-Cause Cancer: New CU research says it! Believe!

“Sick prank”: So saith an Ithaca Fire Lt. of a mannequin found facedown in the gorge. I say it’s kind of funny, in a horrible way?

Doctors Are Paid More than Presidents: “At Cornell, Dr. Zev Rosenwaks of the Center for Reproductive Medicine and Infertility received $3,149,376…” D-Skortz only made around $700k.

Cornell Dots Will Cure Cancer!: What exactly are these “C dots”? “The cluster of dye molecules in a single dot fluoresces under near-infrared light much more brightly than single dye molecules, and the fluorescence will identify malignant cells, showing a surgeon exactly what needs to be cut out and helping ensure that all malignant cells are found.”

Nominate Ur Fwendz: Do u no some1 who iz rly gud at there like orgunizashun? Nom’ them 4 a Student Organization Award or Recognition (SOAR! Far above!). Due Thurz.

“Budget Bondage”: Has the recession been cutting into your plan to one-up Goatse by utilizing expensive state-of-the-art anus-expanding instruments? Then this event is perfect for YOU.

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Since Peter Fritch and I have already covered the ongoing campus debate about the recent flare-up in the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict here and here, we’re going to present the following pictures of the new, “pro-Israel” Arts Quad display without comment. A note: I’m not sure if I got all of the signs, but my fingers were about to freeze off and lose grip of my precious, precious camphone, so take it or leave it.

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Just a little note for the Cornell Store. Love, COLA.

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Borrowed from a wannablog, this image is of Rafah, a town in Gaza reduced to rubble and demolished houses and buildings.

For those actually wanting to engage in a dialogue, meaning the Islamic Alliance for Justice (IAJ), Hillel, Cornell Israel Public Affairs Committee (CIPAC), and the Daily Sun herself, a real panel discussion was held the next day in the same exact room (Lewis Auditorium), one in which the panelists (gasp!) seemed to know what they were talking about.

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The original display, pre-vandalism.

When the encounter involves some 1,300 black flags commemorating the deaths of those killed in the most recent flare-up of the ongoing Israeli-Palestinian conflict, as it did this Monday morning when they were installed, it’s a little harder to criticize the reality of the message or to exorcise it with a nap. Adding fuel to the fire, the flags’ accompanying signs — statements from the UN and Amnesty International about casualties and humanitarian aid — were vandalized by three seemingly “pro-Israel” students later that day. While that situation was quickly rectified and the signs restored, the worst was to come Wednesday night, when the flags were transfigured into a Star of David under cover of darkness, finally garnering the attention of President David Skorton. Here’s an excerpt of the statement he released this afternoon, which neglected to mention the whole, um, Star of David thing:
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College ACB's logo. Vaguely communist? Get McCarthy on this shit, stat.

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One of Coulter's biggest fan's rendition of the superstar herself.

Least appreciated Cornell alum in hot water over technicality: Ann Coulter voted in Connecticut while living in New York. In other news, no one really cares. Except maybe the person who photoshopped the image at left. [Cornell Insider] P.S. We apologize to any Nazis offended by the image.

Milstein hits new roadblock: The plans for the construction of Architecture building Milstein Hall have already taken 10 years to push through. But no! It must not go forward, claim annoying profs like Vincent Mulcahy, who doth protest the lack of accessibility to differently-abled persons: “A handicap [sic] person who might want to study architecture here, it’s impossible.” [News 10 Now]

The nerve!: Either CornellWatch is too young, too unread, and/or too unfabulous, or we got SNUBBED by USNews.com in their “Best Alternative Media Outlet 2008″ contest. Whatever. IvyGate is in dead last, so we’re going to try to be schadenfreude-y about that. [USNews.com]

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